Notes
This poem is inspired by a few different sources:
1. A comment by G.M. Baker on Erik Hoel's essay, in which he stated that language is just a bridge. We each have our thoughts in our heads and feelings in our bodies that are impossible to share with another, until we have language. And even that is just an attempt. But it’s something. Although I also think that there are other forms of communication, including nonverbal, artistic, melodic, and so on. Still, this world is incredibly lonely by default, and unless we can connect with others, we are hopeless.
2. The golden words (which I reference often) are the incredible quotes from various authors that serve as my inspiration for writing, and to be honest, for life itself. Writers like Thoreau, Wallace, Shakespeare, Conrad have written some things that I find to be so true as to be undeniable. It's hard enough to communicate with the people in my life as per point 1, and most of the time I think it’s essentially impossible communicate the most sublime thoughts/feelings/ideas. But these authors seem to be able to do it, and that is wonderful.
3. And what makes their words all the more true is the beauty with which they are written. There is "a fact faced forthright," which can make sense to us and “intrigue the intellect” and then there are the lyrics and poems and lines that stick with you forever and are "sutured into the skeleton." These are the most spectacular bridges of all, because they are not only beautiful to behold, but they also connect me to the experience of these people who I believe know exactly what it's like to be me, to be a human and to go through what I'm going through.
4. Poetry is hard. I don't write it much. I tend to stick with prose, and even within that, I tend towards nonfiction because I've always preferred it to fiction. It's much easier to analyze someone else's work, to build off what they built, or to tear it down and criticize. Fiction is much more elusive and tricky, but because of that, it also tends to be more meaningful. I think stories are perhaps the most persuasive and impactful. I never wanted to write fiction because I thought (and still think) that it's the hardest thing anyone can do. You are basically being task to play the role of God and create something from nothing, to create entire worlds, which are in turn full of individuals who have their own life stories and motivations and emotions. But I have started writing fiction here, and it's been incredibly challenging and rewarding. Am I good at it? By no means. But I’ve learned a ton by doing it and I’ve enjoyed it too. And now I thought it was time to challenge myself again and write some poetry. Am I good at it? At least I tried...
5. Some other poets are also a big inspiration. Shakespeare, obviously (although what's not obvious—something I learned only recently— is that"Shakespeare" was probably not a single person... let that sink in. But I digress). I also love Epic Poetry so Milton, Homer and the other Greeks, Dante, whoever wrote Beowulf, etc. As for more modern poetry, I love the transcendentalists: Whitman, Emerson; even Thoreau dabbled. And even some people I know personally are also really good at poetry, it just comes naturally to them (you know who you are). And that always impresses me.
6. Publishing is still really hard for me. Even now that I do it biweekly. I've written often about how hard it is. But I think having fun with stuff like this is good to keep the tone of The Apocalypse playful and childlike (that sentence seems funny if you were to read it out of context). Otherwise if I take it too seriously, it drains all the joy out of it, and I get self-conscious, and resentful, and depressed, and so on.
Ultimately (I remind myself once again), the goal is to connect with other kindred spirits out there. And so this poem is about that too. The desire to find those (dead or alive) who know what I’m feeling. But also, in order to do that, I have to open my heart and see if it clicks with anyone. Though I imagine it probably won't. But I’ll never know unless I try.
7. Lastly— prosody. The study of rhythm and sound in poetry is called prosody. Even when I write nonfiction, I absolutely love the sound of language. I love a good alliteration and internal rhyme… if you can’t already tell. But prosody can be used in any kind of language—just look at the most compelling orations from history. It's not just the content of their message, but the sound of it. So I wanted to write a poem about prosody.